I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize
