he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
