Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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