P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
porn star boner night. come get it.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
