i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
