you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize
