The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
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it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
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How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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