this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
