Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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