evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Pants 0. Shit 1.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
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