Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Someone came in the potted fern
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Randomize
