i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize