strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
He shit in the fireplace
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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