I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
