So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Drake has all the answers
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
