Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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