Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Someone shattered a urinal.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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