Texts From Last Night

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  (956): View more from Texas

  im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.

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  (956): im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober. http://tfl.nu/pinp
  Replies (10) Good night (2715) Bad night (1137)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  Please dont jizz on my ds screen.

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  (850): Please dont jizz on my ds screen. http://tfl.nu/cm8h
  Replies (18) Good night (880) Bad night (5159)
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  (509): View more from Washington

  I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.

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  (509): I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me. http://tfl.nu/tzej
  Replies (9) Good night (5309) Bad night (689)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.

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  (303): I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete. http://tfl.nu/q4l5
  Replies (19) Good night (4803) Bad night (1305)
• Favorite

  (224): View more from Illinois

  It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'

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  (224): It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat' http://tfl.nu/0g9k
  Replies (12) Good night (1515) Bad night (4016)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes

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  (718): you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes http://tfl.nu/46zk
  Replies (9) Good night (769) Bad night (2811)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.

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  (203): Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good. http://tfl.nu/s47l
  Replies (3) Good night (999) Bad night (2599)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3

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  (850): Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3 http://tfl.nu/b5wj
  Replies (7) Good night (3408) Bad night (797)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.

  (1-406): View more from Montana

  haha i know

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  (406): i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt. (1-406): haha i know http://tfl.nu/vo1w
  Replies (21) Good night (7810) Bad night (1306)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?

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  (708): Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life? http://tfl.nu/qn7b
  Replies (9) Good night (1077) Bad night (715)
• Favorite

  (325): View more from Texas

  My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious

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  (325): My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious http://tfl.nu/543t
  Replies (2) Good night (808) Bad night (455)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits

  (1-919): View more from North Carolina

  Another sexterpiece awaits

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  (919): Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits (1-919): Another sexterpiece awaits http://tfl.nu/xw4q
  Replies (3) Good night (804) Bad night (621)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."

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  (615): Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy." http://tfl.nu/rhbz
  Replies (1) Good night (753) Bad night (593)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.

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  (570): I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far. http://tfl.nu/jtyr
  Replies (1) Good night (597) Bad night (255)
• Favorite

  (979): View more from Texas

  I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.

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  (979): I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer. http://tfl.nu/rxqs
  Replies (5) Good night (644) Bad night (159)

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