we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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