glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
i know! what is this dateline?
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
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i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
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Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in