it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
