Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize