White coat. Heels.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Randomize
