u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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