College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Randomize
