Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
