Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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