If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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