they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
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