What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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