In the future we'll all be gay
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
