If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
