I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
