He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Randomize
