Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
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