my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize