I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
