We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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