butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
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