I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
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