Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
