# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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