Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Randomize
