I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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