At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
