one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
