I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
