A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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