Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
