So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
