She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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