He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
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