If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
i came on her dog
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Randomize
