Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize
